Needless to say, I drank so much of it that I was later walking around the house with wobbly legs. M made fun of me, saying "You're loaded!" I tried to pretend it wasn't so by concentrating on acting normal and walking straight.

I'm thinking of subscribing to Cook's Illustrated magazine. Stop laughing!

No, really. I got a little card about it along with my recent Cooking.com shipment (a vacuum marinader and a 9x13" cake pan in which I can cook my infamous "deep dish pizza"). I can even have a trial free issue before I make a 1-year commitment. These magazines include handy little time-saving tips and ratings of, for example, the tastiest chicken broth.

I figure it will be an experiment, an experiment to see if I will cook more than 1-2 times per month. And at $19.99 for a year's subscription, I think that's a fairly risk-free experiment.

Today is Saturday, thank heavens! I thought the weekend would never get here. M and I are going to run some errands, which will include having lunch at Chevy's.

By the way, my clothes are practically bursting at the seams. I put on some pants today that I haven't worn since last summer and the material is now thinly stretched over my ass. This is very disconcerting.

I don't know what the hell to do. I've been watching my diet and working out like a lunatic. What gives? I am so disappointed, yet have no idea how to fix my expanding body. Should I switch from my current weight lifting and cardio combo workouts to plain cardio workouts for a while? Or should I simply buy some stretchy polyester pants?

How depressing.