Trollop came for a visit last weekend. M drove us around, showing her all the sights of the city. Then, on Sunday night, we caught a ride to Sacramento with her so that we could celebrate Buzzer�s birthday with him, on Memorial Day.

In celebration of Buzzer�s birthday, we went hiking in Auburn Ravine. Thank heavens the weather cooperated with us and wasn�t too hot. We had a nice short hike through the canyon because we got a late start on the day trying to find a restaurant to eat breakfast at and Aunt N and Uncle B were having a barbecue at their place at 3.

I got sunburned, though, even after applying SPF 15 sunblock twice. What�s up with that?! The Farmer Tan look is not becoming and I especially don't want nasty tan lines showing on my wedding day.

We arrived at N & B�s to find almost all the family there! I was surprised. I gorged on chicken, sausage, birthday cake, ice cream, etc. Needless to say, I didn�t eat dinner that night.

We took Amtrak back to San Francisco. That was such a nice, refreshing change from the stop-and-go, bumper-to-bumper traffic on the freeways. We got a table in the refreshment car and lounged about reading newspapers and magazines all the way back to the bay area.

Me likey Amtrak.

I read an article on the train that has consumed my thoughts ever since... and not in a good way. It was an 18-page article documenting the last moments inside the World Trade Towers before they collapsed, pieced together from telephone calls to friends and family members and the first-hand account of survivors. It was a good article, but now I can�t get the grisly images out of my head.

I�m haunted by the woman just two years older than me, who joked about how she needs to get home to her two cats, who instantly died after a fireball came through the elevator shaft while she was waiting for the next elevator down. I�m haunted by the 200 or so people who were trapped at the locked door leading to the roof deck. I�m haunted by the people trapped inside a conference room because the plane�s impact had twisted the door jams. I�m haunted by a restaurant full of people pressing their faces against the windows, trying to get air, and having to wet rags to put over their faces from flower vases on the tables. I�m haunted by images of people sleeping in the stairwells because they were so exhausted trying to ascend or descend stairs in the low oxygen levels.

They all thought help was on the way.

I think, over and over, "What was it like for them the moment the buildings started to crumble? Were they afraid, calm, or perplexed?" I hope they died instantly. I hope they didn�t experience pain.

Although I�m glad I understand the scenario a little better, it�s also much more painful to know the details.

Well, despite the gloom, I do have some good news: You�re now looking at the words of a published writer! The article I submitted about three weeks ago was published today. The only reason I know is because a reader emailed me, asking me a question about the article. So I went to the web site and there it was.

I was a little dismayed to see they had removed a paragraph that included some really good information. To me, the article doesn�t seem as cohesive without it.

But I�m happy regardless. Woo-hoooo!