I just discovered that my favorite Marilyn Manson CDs are missing. I looked in the CD Jukebox and I looked in my car. Nothing. What the....?! How irritating.

The labor and childbirth thing is drawing nearer and nearer. It's becoming a reality. I'm petrified! I'm devouring books in an attempt to learn as much as I can. The more I know, the less scared I become. But I'm still pretty darn scared. My goal is to have a totally au-naturel labor, with no medical intervention.

However, if labor pains are anything like the intenstinal cramping of last month's Monster Flu, I am in big trouble. I was literally in gut-wrenching, writhing, crying pain. I even thought to myself, "If labor is anything like this, I am not going to survive."

I have to keep reminding myself that women have been having birth since the beginning of time. Everyone who is a mother has endured it. It's a rite of passage.

I will soon know what it's all about. Right now it's all so mysterious, full of unknowns. Being the naturallly curious person I am, I'm excited to experience it.

We are interviewing another birth doula tonight. We interviewed one last Sunday and fell in love with her. However, we figured we'd better keep the appointment with this one just for comparison's sake. Still, I can't help feeling like we're wasting her time... and that's not a good feeling.

I'm seriously considering taking one year of maternity leave. I'd better hurry and decide because my last day in the office is April 30th. I just worry about the office logistics, such as 'What will happen to my desk? Will it still be mine? Or will they make me pack it up?' Dumb, I know.

Speaking of work, my coworkers are the greatest. They're organizing a joint baby shower potluck for me and a coworker (whose wife is due 1 month after me) in 4 weeks. It will be a mighty fine celebration before I take off for several months.

Time to go meet the doula. Ciao!