Well, remember my last entry where I wrote about going off birth control pills? And that I was afraid of the effects? The effects I expected were nothing like this.

You're welcome to stop reading anytime if this crosses over into "too much information"....

Suddenly, my libido is raging out of control. Keep in mind that my libido has always been stronger than average. But this? This is downright freaky (although fun, too!). My desires have been waking me up in the middle of the night and I constantly have that "smoldering" feeling in my loins.

Plus, now, suddenly and out of nowhere, my biological clock is now ticking... very, very loudly. I'm fantasizing about being pregnant. The mere thought of conceiving totally turns me on.

WTF?!

I'm really confused here. Starting a family so soon was not even an option two weeks ago. M and I figured we'd probably wait a couple years.

When I was at the "crotch doctor" (as TranceJen would say) last Friday for my annual exam, I announced to the doctor that I had gone off the birth control pills because I was tired of enduring the side effects. I also announced that M and I were thinking of starting a family just so that she didn't try to coerce me into using another form of birth control. I want to go au naturel.

She looked at my chart and said, "Well, you're all set to go. You've had all your vaccinations. Start taking a prenatal vitamin now so that your body is prepared once you finally do get pregnant. Being pregnant sucks all the vitamins and minerals out of you."

With that, she left the room. And I went on my merry way.

The "desires" kicked in full force the next day. I practically attacked M the entire weekend: pouncing on him as he sat unsuspecting at his computer, cornering him in his workshop in the garage. Fortunately, he has no complaints.

This, of course, prompted a talk about what methods of birth control we should use and for how long, wrapped up in a discussion about when to start a family.

Him: "I don't know. What do you think?"

Me: "I think I'm ready to start a family now."

Him: *short pause* "Okay."

I gave him a quizzical look and, in disbelief, said "What?! That's not an answer!"

Then he clarified by saying that he's ready, too. That this isn't the ideal time to have a kid with the upstairs renovation not being finished (or even started) and all but that having a child wouldn't be devastating, either. He also said that the upstairs could be done fairly quickly if need be. We would make do in the meantime.

I told him I expected it to take a while to get pregnant, anyway, and that we could start trying in November, after our 1 year anniversary. That would surely give my body enough time to "readjust" itself after being on hormones for 15 years. In the meantime, we decided not to use any birth control.

After last weekend, I'm not so sure that's a good idea. I got scared that I may already be pregnant after all that "activity" and ran down to the health food store yesterday to buy prenatal vitamins. Many web sites say that taking 400 mcg of folic acid is very important in the first 4 weeks of pregnancy, before a woman knows she's even pregnant. I popped one as soon as I got home as a preventative measure.

Strange how my life can change in just two weeks. Damn these hormones!

On another note, my exam is in two days. TWO DAYS! I'm leaving tomorrow night straight from work to go to Sacramento, where the exam will be held. Wish me luck!

If I don't pass this time, I quit.